The New Messi(ah)

Lionel Messi is quickly becoming one of the top soccer players in the world. At only 19 years of age he dazzles with the ball and after this weeks super goal he has been getting some really high praises from the soccer world. Being compared to the likes of Maradona isn't an easy feat, but Messi has the ability to become the best player in the world. Playing alongside the current best in the world* (Ronaldinho) doesn't hurt either.

Messi is the youngest player to ever score for FC Barcelona and the youngest player ever to play for Argentina in a World Cup. He didn't get much playing time in last years World Cup, but when he did he made the most of it.

If you haven't seen the video everyone is raving about then click here. That boy got skills!

Here is a detailed picture showing Messi's goal alongside Maradona's goal:

My top 10 soccer/football players in the world (right now):

1. C. Ronaldo
1A. Ronaldhino
3. Kaká
4. Messi
5. Henry
6. Drogba
7. Riquelme
8. Totti
9. Raul
10. Van Nistelrooy

* I think C. Ronaldo has become the best in the world but Ronaldinho is 1A.

The Greatest Goal Ever? (Telegraph UK)

Mid-Morning Roundup

Chicks + Sports Blogging = Sports by Brooks. Read a good interview here. (The Big Picture)

A-Rod finally doing what he should have been doing all along (winning games). (SI)

Jen Sterger and Kurt Vonnegut both don't know sports, but have worked with Sports Illustrated. (Sports by Brooks)

Here's something new, College Football players actually being kicked off the team for doing something wrong. (EDSBS)

Pacman is really sorry, so sorry that he's taking out a full page ad to let people know. (ESPN)

Oden ready to get his game on. Conley and Cook not so much. (The Big Lead)

Do you like Italian? The Offside WAG of the week is a winner in my book. (The Offside)

Wine, Champagne and Victoria Silvstedt - The Perfect Vacation

I'm back like a migraine headache ready to irritate the hell out of you. I had the best vacation any American could hope for. I'm convinced that every person in France has at least half of the year off and the other half they pretend to work. I didn't have to travel all over the place and see a bunch of crap I don't really care about this time and it made for a much better experience. I got to relax outside in the sun and eat and drink like a fat guy at a buffet.

I couple of things that really stood out this time around in France were:

1. Television in Europe is much better than here in the States.

There aren't as many commercials and there's nudity! Although I didn't notice as many naked chicks this time around I did get to see Victoria Silvstedt do a much better job than Vanna White on the French version of Wheel of Fortune. You actually watch the show when there's someone that hot.

2. Watching the Champions League in prime time is better than the Super Bowl.

Obviously it's much bigger in Europe and seeing it at 8:00 at night is much better then watching it at 11:00 in the morning online here in the States (or recorded on my DVR). Everybody is off work and the atmosphere is kind of like the Super Bowl only better (maybe it was the champagne or the 2 bottles of wine). I got to watch most of the matches with my wife's cousins, who play at the amateur level and know how to keep the wine flowing. The first leg of the Bayern Munich-AC Milan match-up was some of the best soccer I have ever seen. That was one of the best things I have seen in sports in a long time.

Highlight: My boys (Manchester United) humiliating AC Roma (7-1) in a Quarter Final match. C. Ronaldo is untouchable right now.

3. Wine and lots of time off are the secrets to a longer life

My wife's parents threw a party for us while we were there and I got to meet more of my wife's older relatives. Once again the wine and champagne were flowing and I ended up having a conversation with an 93 year old lady (in French). She was completely coherent and was willing to let me in on her secret for living so long and looking at least 20 years younger than she was. She told me that she eats well all of the time and drinks one glass of wine with lunch and dinner. She also stays away from "stress". When she use to work she had 10 weeks off a year and enjoyed visiting some of her family in the States on vacation.

It was one of those nights that made me realize that I needed to make a change in my life. I haven't yet, but at least I'm more aware of it now. My wife is still in France with my kids and it will give me some more time to plan what we are going to do. Whether that means moving to France or finding another place to move to, I need to go somewhere that I'm not as stressed out so often.

Additional Notes:

Youth Soccer is for fun and not made to be a competitive thing. Kids don't compete in competitive soccer until they are 11 in most of France. I think it's a much better idea, not because of the kids but the parents. Parents tend to want to push their kids to be the best and in doing so burn them out early.

The French Rugby Team wear pink jerseys, but kick ass during the game.

There is more yogurt in a French super market then dudes in a strip club.


All in all I had a really good time on vacation and can't wait till I retire and move to France so I can eat and drink and not be stressed out.

Not All Sports Channels Were Created Equal

I haven't really been posting for the last few days because I'm getting geared up for 2 weeks of European sports viewing action. Today marks my 1 week countdown to European vacation. Not the kind of European vacation that you might be thinking. There will be no Amsterdam or late night raves out at the Disco-tech. I won't be sleeping at a Hostel or meeting promiscuous Swedish twins that get naked at the drop of a hat. It won't be quite that good! It will however be a vacation in which I won't be bothered by my employer. Which for those of us that work way too much and get paid way too little is a godsend. I will be completely detached from the world (internet) for two weeks.

Once every other year my family and I make our pilgrimage to my wife's place of origin in the North of France. For two weeks I get to eat and drink as much bread, wine and cheese as I want. It has become a time for me to fully relax and give my mind a rest. The good thing about being American and going to Normandy (where my wife is from) is they love us there. The whole D-Day thing really gave us a good name. I guess if I were getting my ass annihilated and some people came and saved me, I'd be pretty stoked too.

Anyway, I usually feel like I'm the King of the castle when I'm there. My wife's family usually cater to me because I'm an American who only gets 2 weeks of vacation instead of the 6 weeks they get. Which means that I can wake up whenever I want and don't have to worry about my kids bothering me about breakfast. Another good thing is that when your French isn't that great, like mine, you can pretend like you don't know whats going on. I understand about 98% of what her family says and the other 2% I usually just say I get, but the speaking part is what saves me. I also watch as much television as I want and don't have to hear about it from my wife because of this. When they're talking about family things I slip away and start watching French TV. For those that don't know, European television is basically Cinemax-lite. The reason I say that is because it's like watching soft-core porn. There are always shows with naked women on, even at 9:00 in the morning.

When I'm done getting my daily fix of non-edited euro-sex action I change the channel to Canal+ Sports. This is France's version of ESPN. If you don't like Soccer or Formula 1 then you might as well change the station back to Debbie Does Paris or whatever sex-athon show that's on. You might occasional get a glimpse of some NFL or NBA highlights, but don't count on it. They pretty much get the same amount of air play as ESPN gives to soccer (little to none). Don't even think about Baseball highlights. The best thing about their sports stations are the sportscasters. They make me laugh. It always seems like one guy is always yelling during the highlights. I think they want us to believe that we're really at the stadiums with the fans or something. If it weren't for the UEFA Cup coming up while I'm there, I would really be in trouble. This year I will be in France for both legs of the Quarterfinals. I intend on going to a local pub with my wife's cousins to watch the matches and drink a few too many.

I hope to rest up while I'm there and come back to life in the States with a renewed attitude. One that will hopefully allow me to start blogging a lot more and focus more of my time on things I want to do rather than the things I have to do. I will be posting sporadically throughout the next week and will be on hiatus until April 16th after that. Au revoir!

Mid-Morning Roundup

Greg Oden deserves to party with hot white girls after last night's last minute swat. (The Big Lead)

Tubby Smith is going where? Minnesota is an upgrade? (Rumors and Rants)

Koby is still on a tear and apparently wants the ball. (Signal to Noise)

Joey Porter gets thrown like a little girl. (Sports by Brooks)

Nothing like the WAG of the WEEK to really research European culture. (The Offside)

Beer or Birth Control? You might want to splurge on protection. (AP)

Mid-Morning Roundup

David Carr gets shafted by the man, better known as the Texans head office. (Signal to Noise)

Suzy Kolber vs. Rachel Nichols. Who you got? (The Big Picture)

Tom Brady isn't batting 1000 anymore. (The Big Lead)

Falling asleep at a stop light when you have been drinking is never a good thing. (Deadspin)

If you have seen the movie '300' then you might want to enter this contest. (Bodog)

Is Kobe trying to pedal some 'Nike' to Durant? (LA Times)

A-Rod getting ready for the opt-out portion of his contract and maybe a new friend to have sleep-overs with. (NY Times)

Raiders sign the other Booty to play QB. I'm sure they will be looking at Jeff George again later this month.

Carmen Electra might be a lesbian? I wish it was with someone hotter, maybe like Sienna Miller. (Starpulse)

Late-Morning Roundup

Hey, if Jeff Garcia wants to parade around like he's straight I can respect that, but don't steal a playmate from Hef. (The Hater Nation)

All the other GM's want to be like Mike. (Signal to Noise)

North Carolina just love their basketball team. (Awful Announcing)

"Little Ronaldo" celebrates his birthday today. (The Offside)

George Foreman becomes a judge. It's not an eating contest, is it? (AP)

Scarlett Johansson likes the elderly. What the hell is she thinking? (People)

Dancing With The Stars - Better Known As Athletes Anonymous

Why didn't I DVR "Dancing with the Stars" last night? Oh, that's right, because I still have my balls attached. Although some of the girls on the show are hot, I just can't seem to muster up the strength to sit through stars ex-stars trying to revive their careers by learning how to dance on national TV. It's a popularity contest anyway. For some reason there always seems to be an athlete that does well in the competition though. Jerry Rice did well the first season and Emmitt Smith won last season. This season has Laila Ali, Clyde Drexler and Apolo Anton Ohno all competing for a chance to be in the spotlight again for 15 minutes. Laila will never get as much attention as her father, Clyde was unlucky enough to have played during the Jordan era and is an afterthought of many and Ohno (who?) ice skates for a living. Look guys, if you really want to be in a reality competition, then take Clyde's approach and go on "Pros vs. Joes". You might actually do something your good at rather than look stupid trying to do the Waltz with a tux on.

I guess I understand their logic behind being on the show, but I'm gonna hate having to hear about how good "Clyde the Glide" did on his Samba routine. It's just wrong! I guess if your really hard up and there is nothing else on TV you can give it a shot. I myself would rather watch the same episode of Sponge Bob Square Pants over and over again with my kids.

Bet On: Will Heather Mills prosthetic leg fall off during a dance routine on Dancing with the Stars 4? (Scroll to the bottom)

Mid-Morning Roundup

Pam Oliver vs. Stacey Dales. Who you got? (The Big Picture)

Tim Floyd gets a second chance and a team that doesn't suck. (Extrapolater)

Trouble finds those that can't keep their hands to themselves. Especially roid-rage NFL freaks. (The Big Lead)

Hooligan disguised as a Soccer Dad leaves his mark, an umbrella spoke. (Herald Sun via The Offside)

Where is Quentin Jammer when you need pass interference explained? (Signal to Noise)

Better get the shots and stripper pole ready for the new winner because we know what that contest does to innocent girls. (AP)

The Other Cobi In LA Is Ready To Retire

At a press conference today held at the Home Depot Center, 36 year old Cobi Jones announced that he will retire after the 2007 season. Tim Leiweke, President and CEO of the LA Galaxy had this to say,

"A couple of months ago, Cobi and I had a chance to catch up and have lunch," Leiweke said. "And we sat down and Cobi said, 'Look, there's something I have to tell you. I'm going to retire.'

"And I said, 'Well, that's too bad. I think we've got David Beckham.'

"Then Cobi immediately said, 'At the end of this next season.'

This is pretty big news for me. Cobi is one of the main reasons why I really took an interest in soccer more than 15 years ago. I don't know if it was because I thought he was Bob Marley or if it was his skill with the ball. I remember watching Alexi Lalas and him in the 1994 World Cup. The first time we actually made it to the knockout round. We eventually got beat by Brazil of course, but that team just had something about them and I think Cobi had a lot to do with it. Coby also played for the 1998 and 2002 World Cup Teams and has 15 international goals during his time with the National Team.

I always thought that he would be one of the few Americans that would actually be able to play oversees. He did play one season in the EPL and half a season in Brazil until he eventually came home to help the MLS gain popularity. He has played for the LA Galaxy since the leagues inception and holds the records for games(281), goals(66) and assists(86) for the team. I'll be interested to see how he does with Beckham on the team this year. I think that the Galaxy will definitely be up there when the playoffs come around (which isn't saying much because the MLS sucks). I hope Cobi has a good year and scores some goals. I'm sure after the season is done and he retires he will be announcing games and we can finally get rid of Eric Wynalda.

Cobi Jones to retire (LA Times)

Mid-Afternoon Roundup - St. Patty's Edition

It was a great weekend filled with Guinness and NCAA Basketball. I haven't been posting much because I have been busy at work and the tournament is on. Multi-tasking when you have two active boys isn't the easiest thing to do. Anyway, here are a couple of quick links and thoughts for you to digest.

Betting is definitely not my forte. I'm taking place in an invite only Battle of the Blogs over at NBX Sportsbook and so far I'm only $21,000 in the hole. (NBX)


Joey Porter just got paid and is handing out beat-downs. (The Big Lead)

The love-feast for Kobe continues... (Union Tribune)

Jerramy Stevens enters my list of top 10 guys not to live next to at #1. (Kissing Suzy Kolber)

Keeper vs. Keeper and you just got bounced. (The Offside)

Little brother got the hook up and didn't even have to dance. (People)

St. Patrick's Day - A Day To Drink As Much As You Can And Not Feel Guilty

It used to be a day that I couldn't remember due to the amount of Guinness I would drink, but now with the addition of my two kids, not so much. Tomorrow, on the other hand, I will be attending a "family-style" St. Patty's Day party. I'm not sure if that means I can recruit some of the older kids to watch mine while I drink or if I have to stay completely sober because everyone acts like they're Mormon. My wife hasn't given me the rundown so I'm hoping that it's an actually drinking event. Anyway, have a great weekend and a couple of green beers for me.

How To Survive Work When The NCAA Tournament Is On

Most sports literate people were smart enough to take yesterday and today off. I on the other hand have been forced to work because I have a planned vacation with my family at the end of the month and can't afford to. So what have I done for the last day and a half?

With a manager like mine you have to be creative to stay up to date with the scores. There are a multitude of different sites you can use to stay in the know, but I use a mixture of "live blogs" and the big two to help make my life easier. Thanks to the guys over at Awful Announcing and Deadspin I could actually get a "normal guys" play by play of the games. I also have the scoreboards on ESPN and Sportsline open at all times. I use the Split Browser Firefox add-on to have all windows open simultaneously. When I hear my boss coming I immediately Alt-Tab and act like I'm not wasting the company's money. One of my fellow workers was clever enough to hide a small TV on his desk to watch the games today. I'm trying my hardest to adjust my seat to watch from a far. It's definitely a juggling act and one in which I don't plan on using in the future, but if it gets me through the day without knocking my boss out then I'm happy.

Mid-Morning Roundup

Duke gets beat by VCU and help to make my life much happier. (Clubber Lang's Basement)

Tank Johnson gets 120 days in jail. I'm sure he's planning on celebrating with some uzzies when he gets out. (Chicago Bears)

The 4 vs 5 match-up isn't an easy one. It really comes down to what you like more, Blonde or Brunette? (The Big Picture)

Lakers lose their seventh in a row. Hey Zen master, have you heard of teaching some defense? (LA Times)

Eagles get the last white receiver left in free agency. (ESPN)

Oprah battles Leno for Posh Spice. Damn she's hot, Oprah of course. (Pink Football)

Carmen would rather stay home with me than go out with you. (People)

Michael Vick Just Loves The Pinot Noir

Michael Vick, I mean "Mike Vick" has opened his own winery, The Tasting Room, in suburban Atlanta. When I think of Vick the first thing that comes to mind is a good wine. I mean how else do you think he got the name "Ron Mexico" other than by being a connoisseur of fine wines. Vick is also trying to give back to the community with this new venture. Vick had this to say,

"It's good for people to see that I'm giving back to the community, where people can see me trying to do something that's positive. There's a lot of people speculating about things I do that are not so positive."

This is how you give back to the community? You open a winery? I'm sure all of the poor kids in town will be lining up with the parents for your next Chardonnay tasting. Why not build a park or donate some signed jerseys? Maybe it's the black substance found in the water bottle talking. Why else would he be opening a winery in the Dirty South? Is he gonna have Jermaine Dupree and Packman Jones over for an apéritif before they hit the strip clubs? What wine goes best with chicken wings and peach cobbler anyway?

Restaurant open, but not Vick (AJC.com)

Mid-Morning Roundup

Jenn Sterger doesn't care what she ends up doing for a living. Why not become the nanny for my kids? (The Big Picture)

Which % of the country will see which games? It's not looking to good for you if you want to watch the Nevada-Creighton game. (USA Today)

Suns beat the Mavs in double-OT. Steve Nash just won his third MVP. (SI)

Pete Rose is a douche-bag who bet on his team 'every day'. (The Big Lead)

Raiders impressed with JaMarcus Russell, and so are the all-you-can eat buffets. (2theadvocate)

Gary Matthews Jr. didn't use HGH, he just waited 16 days to say so. (Babes Love Baseball)

Mid-Morning Roundup

Lance Briggs is not a baby, he just needs a hug and some more money. (AOL Sports)

Niagara earn the right to get blown out by Kansas. (March Madness Time)

Europe's finest can't handle the red devils, but who can? (Fox Sports)

Those kindergarten kids are back to calculate the world soccer rankings. (FIFA)

I hate it when Unicorns take over at the wheel. They never seem to be able to handle u-turns. (AP)

I like the idea of cricket now, but only because you really showed me how to play the game. (Sports by Brooks)

P Diddy And Snoop Dogg Have A Soccer Fetish

Did you know that P Diddy and Snoop Dogg were soccer fans and are planning a wild night out with Manchester United later this month? Yeah, I didn't either. I guess that when Diddy and Dogg's tour rolls through Manchester they want the whole team to come to the show and party afterwards (lots of Cristal flowing).

I'm pretty sure when they were asked about the Manchester United futbol football team they were thinking American Football because this is what Snoop had this to say to MTV UK:

"I’m real anxious to meet the Manchester United football team - come holla at Snoop Dogg," he told us. "I’m down with football, I’ve been following it for 10 years, going to games, wearing the jerseys and what not."

Snoop it's soccer not the USC Trojans! The sticky stuff is really starting to mess with your mind kid. You need to clean the carb on your bong man. I think the Angel Dust is starting to mix a little bit too much. Most of these guys are white, and they kick the ball and don't wear pads and a helmet.

Diddy is linked to Wayne Rooney though. Rooney bid over $100,000 for a night out on the town with Diddy last year, but it never happened because Wayne wasn't 21 yet and couldn't go out drinking in the States (damn drinking laws). Maybe he wants to make it up to Rooney by taking him out and having a ménage à trois with him and his girlfriend.

Snoop to Party with Man Utd (MTV UK)
Diddy excited to take Rooney out (The Offside)

Mid-Morning Roundup

Quitting is never an option for Norv Turner (just sucking as a head coach I guess). (Union Tribune)

Who you got? Fill out your New York Legends bracket. (NY Post)

Yo Adrian! I'm starting to get a little flabby, I need some more HGH. I think I try to smuggle some through Australia. (The Big Lead)

The Mob won't be happy, Stardust gets imploded. (AP)

Nobody can tell Tapia what to do. If he want to go party, he'll party. If he wants to overdose on Cocaine, he'll overdose on Cocaine. (Sports Illustrated)

Manchester United play Europe XI today. I have prayed to the soccer gods to make sure that none of my red devils will get jacked up. (Manchester United)

All hands on deck. Disney sues Porn firm for making new comic version of Pirates of the Caribbean where clothes are optional, and so are three-ways. (US Magazine)

How Tom Brady Got His Groove Back

What a off-season for Tom Brady. First he finds out that he might be having 2 kids with 2 different "extremely hot" women, and then he finds out that he will actually have real receivers to throw the ball to when the NFL season starts again. The Patriots are definitely winning Free Agency right now and no one should be happier than "Mr. Tuck Rule" himself. Last year he had a bug-eyed freak as his #1 and now he has Stallworth, Welker and Kyle Brady. These guys are real targets that can actually catch the ball.


You might want to lock up the Daddy-to-be early for your upcoming Fantasy squad. If Stallworth can stay healthy he might have a career year also. I know Brady likes to spread things around (especially his man juice), but I think with a real big play threat like Stallworth Brady will chuck it his way more times than you think. I think the AFC East is in trouble along with most of the NFL. Being a Raider fan I loath Brady and can't wait till some Defensive End take his head off, but we all know that will never happen as he has been anointed the "Golden Child". If they trade for Moss then I'll be convinced the NFL is rigged.

A quick Raider note: Maybe we can sign some more RB's (Jordan, Rhodes, Griffith, Fargas, etc...) or TE's (Anderson, Wakefield, Steward, etc...) as it looks like we don't have enough of them on the roster. Maybe we can trade some of our Offensive Line because we have so many Pro-Bowlers to choose from.

Pats continue spending (ESPN)